If you can keep your counsel talking to their opponents across the aisle,
And encourage negotiation before drafting motions untimely filed;
If you can review EDRs personally, stressing the urgency of a rocket,
And assign one counsel only until the case is on the docket;
If you can demand on-time discovery, and enforce it at each junction,
So that trials aren't delayed by late delivery of production;
If you can ensure requests for experts are presented quickly to the boss,
And, if approved, the contract processed, no matter what the cost;
If you take the proper steps to ensure the safety of our proceeding,
And, while you're at it, double check--safety always bears repeating.
If you can ask your trial judge about the use of MJO,
And, attempt to keep the STR from arriving far too slow;
If you can demand the use of Dragon by your reporters when transcribing,
So it doesn't seem, when we read the record, that the Charlie 5 has been imbibing;
Then come your Article 6, you will most surely earn an "A,"
And perhaps you, like Colonel Kent, will be a six-time SJA.